Recently, I go back to my teenaged-MCR-fangirl mode. I binge watch their videos on YouTube: music videos, the making of the music videos, live performance, and interviews. I feel various emotion hit me, in a good way.
I didn’t even know how it started. Oh, maybe I know. Let me remember.
I have been feeling down and when I feel down, I usually project my feeling to a kind of escape. About few weeks ago, I watched Dan and Phil a lot then I remembered Muse. I watched Muse then I remembered my teenaged self. After that I watched My Chemical Romance. Until now.
I started by remembering my two friends who were also drummers years ago. When talking about “Welcome to the Black Parade”, one said that the drum playing was crazy, the other one said, “It’s played by two drummers. It’s impossible for one drummer to play it.” Despite listening to music a lot, my ears are never sensitive. Few days ago, I found the drum cover of Welcome to the Black Parade by COOP3RDRUMM3R and the drummer in that video “doubled himself” so yes, the song needs more than one drummer.
I listened to many of their songs then I remembered the song “Disenchanted“. When I think of My Chemical Romance, “Disenchanted” doesn’t usually come to my mind but this time it does. After I listened to it again, I felt something strange. I felt sad, longing for something that I have lost, but at the same time, I accepted the losing.
Then I listened to their post-breakup songs. I like Gerard Way’s “Brother“, Frank Iero’s “B.F.F.“, and Ray Toro’s “Isn’t That Something“. Listening to “Brother” after “Disenchanted” may not be a good idea because that “strange feeling” was doubled. Frank Iero’s “B.F.F.” is cute because he performs it with his twin daughters. “Isn’t That Something” by Ray Toro is simply amazing.
I watched the making of Helena video and I was like, “How can I just realise that Frank Iero was adorable?” In that video making process, Ray was like a dad keeping Frank from doing silly thing.
There was also this one interview with Frank Iero and Ray Toro that warmed my heart. A fan asked, “How does it feel when someone tells you that your band saved their life?” Frank said, “I’m happy that we inspired them but they need to give themselves more credit.” And Ray added, “We might give them a little push with the song but it’s definitely them finding the strength within themselves.”
I guess it’s great to know how a band can inspire their fans even after the breakup. They also made their own eulogy, a song entitled “Fake Your Death“. The song is honest and quite “raw”, with video that contains so many “feels”, especially in the “Just look at all that pain” part.
“My Chemical Romance is done. But it can never die,” Gerard Way said in his “letter“, which he closed with, “Because it is not a band- it is an idea.” Yes, it is an idea that has inspired my teenaged self. I guess it was an idea that she wanted to keep and I’m thankful for that. Hi my teenaged self, I’m not okay but I am not afraid to keep on living.